14th January 2003 - The Personal Hand Shredder! A very useful piece of office equipment, specifically designed for you to rip your hands off!
16th January 2003 - Star Trek: Nemesis Reviewed! Why the tenth Star Trek film is probably the worst yet!
6th February 2003 - The Great Wuh Huh Huh Song Debate! It's not silly. Really it's not.
8th February 2003 - Frightening FreeCell Statistics! Just how many games of FreeCell do I play a day?
20th February 2003 - Puddle Lane! Anyone remember Puddle Lane? I do, but not very well!
24th February 2003 - A lost scene from The Lord of the Rings! My long overdue first article on The Lord of the Rings!
13th March 2003 - 'Here We Go' - a mind-numbingly stupid and boring children's reading book from the 1960s - reviewed! Can't really say much more than that.
20th March 2003 - He-Man's Useless Friends! Three of He-Man's most useless allies come under the spotlight!
21st March 2003 - A review of another Turtles Episode! The classic 'Sky Turtles' examined!
26th March 2003 - Trapjaw's Action Figure! The Trapjaw figure in the new He-Man range is examined!
26th April 2003 - A Discussion About Pogs! Remember Pogs? It took me a while, but I do!
26th April 2003 - Fiendish Feet: The Update! Contrary to popular belief, there is still more to say about this fascinating subject!
27th April 2003 - Skeletor's Most Useless Allies! Just like He-Man, Skeletor came equipped with some really stupid assistants!
28th April 2003 - Hordak's Most Useless Allies! And in our first She-Ra article here on Heath the Rat's Silly Page, we discuss the three most stupid evil characters to grace that cartoon!
3rd May 2003 - A Long and Irritating Rant about my Laptop! My laptop really pissed me off last night. Here's why.
5th May 2003 - Tony Hawks: Skateboarder Pro! Oddly enough, I don't like this game. Therefore, I thought I'd write and say why.
9th May 2003 - More of Skeletor's Stupid Friends! I can't resist talking about He-Man, so here's another batch of really stupid characters!
10th May 2003 - 'Search For A Son' Reviewed! And for the first time in many months, we have another He-Man episode review!
15th May 2003 - 101 Fun Things To Do With A Corpse, Part 1! Okay, it's not actually 101. It's actually only 12. But they're still fun.
15th May 2003 - Tiny Planets: A Modern-Day Children's Programme! Yes, I know it's unusual for me to discuss anything created later than 1990, but this is just so weird, it's too good to miss!
17th May 2003 - My Rainbow Article! Another of those classic programmes we used to watch!
21st May 2003 - More of He-Man's Stupid Allies! Who else on Eternia can be insulted?
24th May 2003 - Samurai Pizza Cats! I just love it when I suddenly remember something else particularly inane from my childhood! Admittedly, I don't remember much about this one, but even so ...
25th May 2003 - 'The Toymaker' Reviewed! Yes, everybody, it's another He-Man episode from my seemingly inexhaustable supply!
31st May 2003 - My Trip to France! I encountered two things worthy of insulting in France this week - a really bad support group and a truly inane television game show!
6th July 2003 - 'How To' with Heath the Rat! Heath the Rat gives some helpful tips on how to do simple things!
16th July 2003 - An Exciting Discussion about the Secret Seven! Enid Blyton's stupidest creation comes under the spotlight!
24th August 2003 - The Legend of Skeletor's Ghost! One of the most stupid He-Man action figures examined!
24th August 2003 - The Big Blue Box! A really good story!
24th August 2003 - Crabs - the Be All and End All! Why humanity should evolve into crabs.
18th October 2003 - Power! How to get it, how to use it.
24th October 2003 - How It All Began! The fascinating origin tale of the Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles called into dispute!
5th November 2003 - 'The Cosmic Comet' Reviewed! Yes, baby, I have another He-Man episode to review!
21st November 2003 - My Exciting Train Journey! Doesn't sound thrilling, does it. Well, I assure you, it wasn't. However, it was annoying.
23rd November 2003 - 'Night of the Shadowbeasts' Reviewed! I have finally managed to see an episode of the new He-Man series! Sadly, it's not very good.
29th November 2003 - Fiendish Feet. Again. It may be confusing you all as to how I might squeeze out yet another article on Fiendish Feet. And to be honest, it confuses me too. But this one's got a picture in it!
1st December 2003 - A Pointless Article About 1st December! Which is no more, and no less, than it says it is.