Excuse me, faithful followers, while I indulge in a grumpy rant.
I’m pretty pleased with myself this year, because I’ve nearly finished my Christmas shopping. I was just putting the finishing touches to it on Amazon this evening, with the purchase of a book entitled ‘The Legacy’ for my gran. All well and good, you say, so why the grumpy rant? Well, bear with me, and I shall tell you.
Having paid for ‘The Legacy’, Amazon took me to a page where I can “share my purchase”. There are three little buttons there, offering me various options. I can post the pointless phrase “I just bought The Legacy by Katherine Webb on Amazon.co.uk” onto my facebook profile, or I can put the identical phrase on Twitter, or – most pointless of all – I can send an email to say what I’ve just bought. Who would I send this to? The only person likely to be at all interested is my gran, and it would rather spoil her Christmas surprise. Anyone else I sent this email to would conclude that at best I’m an indescribably dull person, and at worst a gibbering mentalist.
And this is what I’m ranting about. We’ve got all these options to share everything that we do, all the time. People almost certainly mindlessly press these idiotic buttons and broadcast this irrelevant information without even thinking. But who needs to know and why?
You may think I’m over-reacting to a harmless bit of fun. And yes, to be fair, I probably am. But try as I may, when I see these buttons or other opportunities to pointlessly broadcast my tiny life, I can’t help but imagine the whole procedure if this was ten years ago. Picture the scene: you’re in Waterstones, browsing the shelves. You pick up a copy of The Legacy or some other trash. You carry it to the till and are instantly greeted by a mindless cacophony of morons screaming, “I just bought Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton!” “I just bought Coming Home by Rosamund Pilcher!” “I just bought Five Go To Finniston Farm by Enid Blyton!” and so on. Now do you understand why I think this whole thing seems mental?
Thank you for indulging me. Next week – Owen suffers a nervous breakdown induced by apoplectic impotent rage. Don’t miss it!